Hi im blue moon very horny curvy blonde 100 percent English who just loves to be naughty once in a while.really do love a good chat too as im a chatterbox lol love doing aromatherapy girl next door type of girl.happy Christmas come and play
aromatherapy with a twist you wouldn't be disappointed
satisfaction with a smile 😊 come say hi as im always friendly and
polite
.
this is my hobby !! plus love meeting new people .
love to be naughty once in a while and like quality over quantity..
hi I'm blue moon .. as I play once in a blue moon if you're lucky
I'm curvy bubbly and sexy as hell Bridget Jones type of girl warm and friendly and a lot of laff
I'm size 12 top size 38 dbra
I'm a size 12 bottom I'm not slim I'm cuddley if you want a super model who's slim I'm not for you . I don't smoke but don't mind if you do I also have a couple of tattoos .
I'm very naughty slightly mad young at heart single female who loves life so if you would like to meet and have the best time of your life come say hi I don't bite much looking
Right were do I start lol good question.
well The Trouser Snake is the world's most dangerous snake. Color varies from pink to black. It's fangless, average length 5 - 6 inches (although some are said to reach 12 inches depending on honesty of it's owner) it appears usually in bedrooms attacking women in the mouth or lower abdominal area. It's highly venomous spit can cause swelling lasting 9 months! Some mutant species have also been known to attack men from behind lol well if you fancy having a date with the girl next door type who turns from classy to naughty in 60 seconds 😅😅😅I'm your very own Bridget Jones type of girl and I'm sure to make you laff and cum at the same time so if you fancy that special occasion or night I'm good company and promise to leave a smile on your face . So don't be sat all on your when you have little me to come out and party , meal out wanting good company and for get the rest of the world for a day or night come say hi I don't bite much 😆😎😂😂😂😇
xx let me tease please and play with you until you burst full xxx im very well groomed and always freshly showered n shaved. come and enjoy me and let me be your FANTASY xxx
Massage included ask for details fully qualified sports therapy and aromatherapy or massage with a happy ending
let me be your bad habit today . let's make the sunshine but soak the bed sheets lol
Every time you come around, you know I can't say no
Every time the sun goes down, I let you take control
I can feel the paradise before my world implodes
And tonight had something wonderful
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lеad to you
Every pure intention ends when the good times start
Fallin' over everything to reach the first-time spark
Started under neon lights and then it all got dark
I only know how to go too far
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
We took the long way 'round
And burned 'til the fun ran out, now
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
50 shades of Grimsby & Meggies
It was a hot January day so I’d decided to get the bus down Meggies to sit outside the Wellow. As he approached, his pasty and feeble upper body exposed, inked with self inflicted biro tattoos, draped in Elizabeth Duke bling, his Rockport’s tucked into his socks and tracksuit, his smile told me it was benefit day and we’d be getting proper wasted and that..........our tracksuits would be hanging off his light bulb tonight.....theBlue Wicked and MCAT flowed.....
It was Dwayne's birthday. We normally eat from the chippy every night so I decided to prepare a special meal of Findus Crispy Pancakes smothered with a Pot Noodle. I would let him take me any way he wanted tonight. His favourite position was what he called The Dogs of War. Where he took me from behind and played Call of Duty at the same time. I liked it this way as I could check me Facebook too and then update me mam when he came.....
Our 6 week anniversary was approaching. I think this would be my longest relationship without becoming pregnant? At least it defo would be since leaving big school. I thought of this as he lay on top of me giving me one. His skinny arms straddled my head like breadsticks either side of an orange. As I rubbed his whiter than white back, I imagined every mole I felt was spelling out Braille for I love you.
As I stood in line at the Job Centre thinking of reasons I couldn't work, a sweet smell drifted past my unblocked left nostril. B.O and Old Spice. I turned around and there was Dwayne. Our eyes met and he was soon fingering me in the bogs in Cue World.
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.
While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"
"No!" she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her.
As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked.
"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself.
He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.
"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.
As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you.
He asks if you’re afraid and you shake your head bravely. He has had more experience, but it’s the first time his finger has found the right place.
He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he’s gentle like he promised he’d be.
He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him-he’s done this many times before.
His cool smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him more room for an easy entrance.
You begin to plead and beg him to hurry, but he slowly takes his time, wanting to cause you as little pain as possible. As he presses closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give way; pain surges throughout your body.
He looks at you concerned and asks you if it’s too painful. Your eyes are filled with tears but you shake your head and nod for him to go on. He begins going in and out with skill but you are now too numb to feel him within you.
After a few moments, you feel something bursting within you and he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to have it over. He looks at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a chuckle; that you have been his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your dentist. After all, it was your first time to have a tooth pulled.
Naughty, Naughty!
Excuse me, What were you thinking ...
After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this Veet as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.
I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.
Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the the destruction of the meat and two veg.
Struggling not to bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel off in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen, by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.
I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, took the lid off and positioned it under me.
The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing returned. Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon.
I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and an tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.
This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found its way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.
The only solution my pain-crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before. Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen, the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering," arhhh ooooohhh that feels good ahhh" Understandably, this was a shock to her and she let out a scream, and as I hadn't heard her come in, it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.
I can understand that having a sprout fired against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status. So to sum it up, VEET removes hair, dignity and self-respect.🤣🤣🤣Xx
horny naughty girl with a tight wet pussy, I'll squirt if your fingers hit that spot ! My nipples love being sucked and my pussy licked, i have sexy outfits to play with you guys in 😍😍😗😗
I'm available for the girlfriend Experience nice romantic nights out to kinky nights in and so make a nice holiday companion ask me for details I'm ready for a nice holiday away or just a naughty weekend come 😜
...
webcam and phone sex available..
sports therapy massage and aromatherapy available with happy ending with or without massage available .. and
🤪😜🤪😜🤪
I also have a wish list if you would like to view .
… I can buy myself flowers
Write my name in the sand
Talk to myself for hours
Say things you don't understand
I can take myself dancing
And I can hold my own hand
Yeah, I can love me better than you can
… Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
…
satisfaction with a smile 😊 come say hi as im always friendly and
polite
.
this is my hobby !! plus love meeting new people .
love to be naughty once in a while and like quality over quantity..
hi I'm blue moon .. as I play once in a blue moon if you're lucky
I'm curvy bubbly and sexy as hell Bridget Jones type of girl warm and friendly and a lot of laff
I'm size 12 top size 38 dbra
I'm a size 12 bottom I'm not slim I'm cuddley if you want a super model who's slim I'm not for you . I don't smoke but don't mind if you do I also have a couple of tattoos .
I'm very naughty slightly mad young at heart single female who loves life so if you would like to meet and have the best time of your life come say hi I don't bite much looking
Right were do I start lol good question.
well The Trouser Snake is the world's most dangerous snake. Color varies from pink to black. It's fangless, average length 5 - 6 inches (although some are said to reach 12 inches depending on honesty of it's owner) it appears usually in bedrooms attacking women in the mouth or lower abdominal area. It's highly venomous spit can cause swelling lasting 9 months! Some mutant species have also been known to attack men from behind lol well if you fancy having a date with the girl next door type who turns from classy to naughty in 60 seconds 😅😅😅I'm your very own Bridget Jones type of girl and I'm sure to make you laff and cum at the same time so if you fancy that special occasion or night I'm good company and promise to leave a smile on your face . So don't be sat all on your when you have little me to come out and party , meal out wanting good company and for get the rest of the world for a day or night come say hi I don't bite much 😆😎😂😂😂😇
xx let me tease please and play with you until you burst full xxx im very well groomed and always freshly showered n shaved. come and enjoy me and let me be your FANTASY xxx
Massage included ask for details fully qualified sports therapy and aromatherapy or massage with a happy ending
let me be your bad habit today . let's make the sunshine but soak the bed sheets lol
Every time you come around, you know I can't say no
Every time the sun goes down, I let you take control
I can feel the paradise before my world implodes
And tonight had something wonderful
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lеad to you
Every pure intention ends when the good times start
Fallin' over everything to reach the first-time spark
Started under neon lights and then it all got dark
I only know how to go too far
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
We took the long way 'round
And burned 'til the fun ran out, now
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
50 shades of Grimsby & Meggies
It was a hot January day so I’d decided to get the bus down Meggies to sit outside the Wellow. As he approached, his pasty and feeble upper body exposed, inked with self inflicted biro tattoos, draped in Elizabeth Duke bling, his Rockport’s tucked into his socks and tracksuit, his smile told me it was benefit day and we’d be getting proper wasted and that..........our tracksuits would be hanging off his light bulb tonight.....theBlue Wicked and MCAT flowed.....
It was Dwayne's birthday. We normally eat from the chippy every night so I decided to prepare a special meal of Findus Crispy Pancakes smothered with a Pot Noodle. I would let him take me any way he wanted tonight. His favourite position was what he called The Dogs of War. Where he took me from behind and played Call of Duty at the same time. I liked it this way as I could check me Facebook too and then update me mam when he came.....
Our 6 week anniversary was approaching. I think this would be my longest relationship without becoming pregnant? At least it defo would be since leaving big school. I thought of this as he lay on top of me giving me one. His skinny arms straddled my head like breadsticks either side of an orange. As I rubbed his whiter than white back, I imagined every mole I felt was spelling out Braille for I love you.
As I stood in line at the Job Centre thinking of reasons I couldn't work, a sweet smell drifted past my unblocked left nostril. B.O and Old Spice. I turned around and there was Dwayne. Our eyes met and he was soon fingering me in the bogs in Cue World.
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.
While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"
"No!" she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her.
As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked.
"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself.
He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.
"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.
As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you.
He asks if you’re afraid and you shake your head bravely. He has had more experience, but it’s the first time his finger has found the right place.
He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he’s gentle like he promised he’d be.
He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him-he’s done this many times before.
His cool smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him more room for an easy entrance.
You begin to plead and beg him to hurry, but he slowly takes his time, wanting to cause you as little pain as possible. As he presses closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give way; pain surges throughout your body.
He looks at you concerned and asks you if it’s too painful. Your eyes are filled with tears but you shake your head and nod for him to go on. He begins going in and out with skill but you are now too numb to feel him within you.
After a few moments, you feel something bursting within you and he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to have it over. He looks at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a chuckle; that you have been his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your dentist. After all, it was your first time to have a tooth pulled.
Naughty, Naughty!
Excuse me, What were you thinking ...
After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this Veet as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.
I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.
Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the the destruction of the meat and two veg.
Struggling not to bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel off in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen, by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.
I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, took the lid off and positioned it under me.
The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing returned. Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon.
I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and an tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.
This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found its way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.
The only solution my pain-crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before. Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen, the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering," arhhh ooooohhh that feels good ahhh" Understandably, this was a shock to her and she let out a scream, and as I hadn't heard her come in, it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.
I can understand that having a sprout fired against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status. So to sum it up, VEET removes hair, dignity and self-respect.🤣🤣🤣Xx
horny naughty girl with a tight wet pussy, I'll squirt if your fingers hit that spot ! My nipples love being sucked and my pussy licked, i have sexy outfits to play with you guys in 😍😍😗😗
I'm available for the girlfriend Experience nice romantic nights out to kinky nights in and so make a nice holiday companion ask me for details I'm ready for a nice holiday away or just a naughty weekend come 😜
...
webcam and phone sex available..
sports therapy massage and aromatherapy available with happy ending with or without massage available .. and
🤪😜🤪😜🤪
I also have a wish list if you would like to view .
… I can buy myself flowers
Write my name in the sand
Talk to myself for hours
Say things you don't understand
I can take myself dancing
And I can hold my own hand
Yeah, I can love me better than you can
… Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
…
Vitals
Gender
Female
Age
53
Orientation
Bi-curious
Nationality
British
Ethnicity
White
Dress Size
12
Height
5'0
Chest Size
Large
Hair Colour
Blonde
Hair Length
Medium
Eye Colour
Blue
Pubic Hair
Shaved Completely
Location
Town / City
Grimsby
County
North East Lincolnshire
Region
Yorkshire & the Humber
Country
United Kingdom
Activity
Last Login
Thursday
Views
221434
Registered
05/02/2017
Hi im blue moon very horny curvy blonde 100 percent English who just loves to be naughty once in a while.really do love a good chat too as im a chatterbox lol love doing aromatherapy girl next door type of girl.happy Christmas come and play
aromatherapy with a twist you wouldn't be disappointed
satisfaction with a smile 😊 come say hi as im always friendly and
polite
.
this is my hobby !! plus love meeting new people .
love to be naughty once in a while and like quality over quantity..
hi I'm blue moon .. as I play once in a blue moon if you're lucky
I'm curvy bubbly and sexy as hell Bridget Jones type of girl warm and friendly and a lot of laff
I'm size 12 top size 38 dbra
I'm a size 12 bottom I'm not slim I'm cuddley if you want a super model who's slim I'm not for you . I don't smoke but don't mind if you do I also have a couple of tattoos .
I'm very naughty slightly mad young at heart single female who loves life so if you would like to meet and have the best time of your life come say hi I don't bite much looking
Right were do I start lol good question.
well The Trouser Snake is the world's most dangerous snake. Color varies from pink to black. It's fangless, average length 5 - 6 inches (although some are said to reach 12 inches depending on honesty of it's owner) it appears usually in bedrooms attacking women in the mouth or lower abdominal area. It's highly venomous spit can cause swelling lasting 9 months! Some mutant species have also been known to attack men from behind lol well if you fancy having a date with the girl next door type who turns from classy to naughty in 60 seconds 😅😅😅I'm your very own Bridget Jones type of girl and I'm sure to make you laff and cum at the same time so if you fancy that special occasion or night I'm good company and promise to leave a smile on your face . So don't be sat all on your when you have little me to come out and party , meal out wanting good company and for get the rest of the world for a day or night come say hi I don't bite much 😆😎😂😂😂😇
xx let me tease please and play with you until you burst full xxx im very well groomed and always freshly showered n shaved. come and enjoy me and let me be your FANTASY xxx
Massage included ask for details fully qualified sports therapy and aromatherapy or massage with a happy ending
let me be your bad habit today . let's make the sunshine but soak the bed sheets lol
Every time you come around, you know I can't say no
Every time the sun goes down, I let you take control
I can feel the paradise before my world implodes
And tonight had something wonderful
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lеad to you
Every pure intention ends when the good times start
Fallin' over everything to reach the first-time spark
Started under neon lights and then it all got dark
I only know how to go too far
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
We took the long way 'round
And burned 'til the fun ran out, now
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
50 shades of Grimsby & Meggies
It was a hot January day so I’d decided to get the bus down Meggies to sit outside the Wellow. As he approached, his pasty and feeble upper body exposed, inked with self inflicted biro tattoos, draped in Elizabeth Duke bling, his Rockport’s tucked into his socks and tracksuit, his smile told me it was benefit day and we’d be getting proper wasted and that..........our tracksuits would be hanging off his light bulb tonight.....theBlue Wicked and MCAT flowed.....
It was Dwayne's birthday. We normally eat from the chippy every night so I decided to prepare a special meal of Findus Crispy Pancakes smothered with a Pot Noodle. I would let him take me any way he wanted tonight. His favourite position was what he called The Dogs of War. Where he took me from behind and played Call of Duty at the same time. I liked it this way as I could check me Facebook too and then update me mam when he came.....
Our 6 week anniversary was approaching. I think this would be my longest relationship without becoming pregnant? At least it defo would be since leaving big school. I thought of this as he lay on top of me giving me one. His skinny arms straddled my head like breadsticks either side of an orange. As I rubbed his whiter than white back, I imagined every mole I felt was spelling out Braille for I love you.
As I stood in line at the Job Centre thinking of reasons I couldn't work, a sweet smell drifted past my unblocked left nostril. B.O and Old Spice. I turned around and there was Dwayne. Our eyes met and he was soon fingering me in the bogs in Cue World.
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.
While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"
"No!" she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her.
As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked.
"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself.
He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.
"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.
As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you.
He asks if you’re afraid and you shake your head bravely. He has had more experience, but it’s the first time his finger has found the right place.
He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he’s gentle like he promised he’d be.
He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him-he’s done this many times before.
His cool smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him more room for an easy entrance.
You begin to plead and beg him to hurry, but he slowly takes his time, wanting to cause you as little pain as possible. As he presses closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give way; pain surges throughout your body.
He looks at you concerned and asks you if it’s too painful. Your eyes are filled with tears but you shake your head and nod for him to go on. He begins going in and out with skill but you are now too numb to feel him within you.
After a few moments, you feel something bursting within you and he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to have it over. He looks at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a chuckle; that you have been his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your dentist. After all, it was your first time to have a tooth pulled.
Naughty, Naughty!
Excuse me, What were you thinking ...
After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this Veet as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.
I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.
Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the the destruction of the meat and two veg.
Struggling not to bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel off in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen, by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.
I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, took the lid off and positioned it under me.
The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing returned. Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon.
I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and an tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.
This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found its way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.
The only solution my pain-crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before. Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen, the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering," arhhh ooooohhh that feels good ahhh" Understandably, this was a shock to her and she let out a scream, and as I hadn't heard her come in, it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.
I can understand that having a sprout fired against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status. So to sum it up, VEET removes hair, dignity and self-respect.🤣🤣🤣Xx
horny naughty girl with a tight wet pussy, I'll squirt if your fingers hit that spot ! My nipples love being sucked and my pussy licked, i have sexy outfits to play with you guys in 😍😍😗😗
I'm available for the girlfriend Experience nice romantic nights out to kinky nights in and so make a nice holiday companion ask me for details I'm ready for a nice holiday away or just a naughty weekend come 😜
...
webcam and phone sex available..
sports therapy massage and aromatherapy available with happy ending with or without massage available .. and
🤪😜🤪😜🤪
I also have a wish list if you would like to view .
… I can buy myself flowers
Write my name in the sand
Talk to myself for hours
Say things you don't understand
I can take myself dancing
And I can hold my own hand
Yeah, I can love me better than you can
… Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
…
satisfaction with a smile 😊 come say hi as im always friendly and
polite
.
this is my hobby !! plus love meeting new people .
love to be naughty once in a while and like quality over quantity..
hi I'm blue moon .. as I play once in a blue moon if you're lucky
I'm curvy bubbly and sexy as hell Bridget Jones type of girl warm and friendly and a lot of laff
I'm size 12 top size 38 dbra
I'm a size 12 bottom I'm not slim I'm cuddley if you want a super model who's slim I'm not for you . I don't smoke but don't mind if you do I also have a couple of tattoos .
I'm very naughty slightly mad young at heart single female who loves life so if you would like to meet and have the best time of your life come say hi I don't bite much looking
Right were do I start lol good question.
well The Trouser Snake is the world's most dangerous snake. Color varies from pink to black. It's fangless, average length 5 - 6 inches (although some are said to reach 12 inches depending on honesty of it's owner) it appears usually in bedrooms attacking women in the mouth or lower abdominal area. It's highly venomous spit can cause swelling lasting 9 months! Some mutant species have also been known to attack men from behind lol well if you fancy having a date with the girl next door type who turns from classy to naughty in 60 seconds 😅😅😅I'm your very own Bridget Jones type of girl and I'm sure to make you laff and cum at the same time so if you fancy that special occasion or night I'm good company and promise to leave a smile on your face . So don't be sat all on your when you have little me to come out and party , meal out wanting good company and for get the rest of the world for a day or night come say hi I don't bite much 😆😎😂😂😂😇
xx let me tease please and play with you until you burst full xxx im very well groomed and always freshly showered n shaved. come and enjoy me and let me be your FANTASY xxx
Massage included ask for details fully qualified sports therapy and aromatherapy or massage with a happy ending
let me be your bad habit today . let's make the sunshine but soak the bed sheets lol
Every time you come around, you know I can't say no
Every time the sun goes down, I let you take control
I can feel the paradise before my world implodes
And tonight had something wonderful
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lеad to you
Every pure intention ends when the good times start
Fallin' over everything to reach the first-time spark
Started under neon lights and then it all got dark
I only know how to go too far
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
We took the long way 'round
And burned 'til the fun ran out, now
My bad habits lead to late nights, endin' alone
Conversations with a stranger I barely know
Swearin' this will be the last, but it probably won't
I got nothin' left to lose, or use, or do
My bad habits lead to wide eyes starin' at space
And I know I'll lose control of the things that I say
Yeah, I was lookin' for a way out, now I can't escape
Nothin' happens after two, it's truе, it's true
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
My bad habits lead to you
50 shades of Grimsby & Meggies
It was a hot January day so I’d decided to get the bus down Meggies to sit outside the Wellow. As he approached, his pasty and feeble upper body exposed, inked with self inflicted biro tattoos, draped in Elizabeth Duke bling, his Rockport’s tucked into his socks and tracksuit, his smile told me it was benefit day and we’d be getting proper wasted and that..........our tracksuits would be hanging off his light bulb tonight.....theBlue Wicked and MCAT flowed.....
It was Dwayne's birthday. We normally eat from the chippy every night so I decided to prepare a special meal of Findus Crispy Pancakes smothered with a Pot Noodle. I would let him take me any way he wanted tonight. His favourite position was what he called The Dogs of War. Where he took me from behind and played Call of Duty at the same time. I liked it this way as I could check me Facebook too and then update me mam when he came.....
Our 6 week anniversary was approaching. I think this would be my longest relationship without becoming pregnant? At least it defo would be since leaving big school. I thought of this as he lay on top of me giving me one. His skinny arms straddled my head like breadsticks either side of an orange. As I rubbed his whiter than white back, I imagined every mole I felt was spelling out Braille for I love you.
As I stood in line at the Job Centre thinking of reasons I couldn't work, a sweet smell drifted past my unblocked left nostril. B.O and Old Spice. I turned around and there was Dwayne. Our eyes met and he was soon fingering me in the bogs in Cue World.
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.
While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"
"No!" she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her.
As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked.
"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself.
He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.
"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.
As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you.
He asks if you’re afraid and you shake your head bravely. He has had more experience, but it’s the first time his finger has found the right place.
He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he’s gentle like he promised he’d be.
He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him-he’s done this many times before.
His cool smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him more room for an easy entrance.
You begin to plead and beg him to hurry, but he slowly takes his time, wanting to cause you as little pain as possible. As he presses closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give way; pain surges throughout your body.
He looks at you concerned and asks you if it’s too painful. Your eyes are filled with tears but you shake your head and nod for him to go on. He begins going in and out with skill but you are now too numb to feel him within you.
After a few moments, you feel something bursting within you and he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to have it over. He looks at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a chuckle; that you have been his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your dentist. After all, it was your first time to have a tooth pulled.
Naughty, Naughty!
Excuse me, What were you thinking ...
After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this Veet as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.
I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.
At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.
Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the the destruction of the meat and two veg.
Struggling not to bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel off in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen, by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.
I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, took the lid off and positioned it under me.
The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing returned. Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon.
I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and an tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.
This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found its way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running its engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.
The only solution my pain-crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before. Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen, the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering," arhhh ooooohhh that feels good ahhh" Understandably, this was a shock to her and she let out a scream, and as I hadn't heard her come in, it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.
I can understand that having a sprout fired against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status. So to sum it up, VEET removes hair, dignity and self-respect.🤣🤣🤣Xx
horny naughty girl with a tight wet pussy, I'll squirt if your fingers hit that spot ! My nipples love being sucked and my pussy licked, i have sexy outfits to play with you guys in 😍😍😗😗
I'm available for the girlfriend Experience nice romantic nights out to kinky nights in and so make a nice holiday companion ask me for details I'm ready for a nice holiday away or just a naughty weekend come 😜
...
webcam and phone sex available..
sports therapy massage and aromatherapy available with happy ending with or without massage available .. and
🤪😜🤪😜🤪
I also have a wish list if you would like to view .
… I can buy myself flowers
Write my name in the sand
Talk to myself for hours
Say things you don't understand
I can take myself dancing
And I can hold my own hand
Yeah, I can love me better than you can
… Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
…
I Enjoy
- BDSMCIM (at discretion)Cross DressingDeep ThroatDinner DatesDisabled ClientsDomination (giving)Domination (receiving)Face SittingFacialsFemale EjaculationFetishFingering/Finger PlayFoot WorshipHand ReliefMMF 3SomesMassageNaturism/NudismOral Oral without (at discretion)PartiesPenetration (Protected)Prostate MassageReceiving OralRole Play & FantasySauna / Bath HousesSpankingSpanking (giving)Spanking (receiving)StripteaseSwallow (at discretion)SwingingSybian & Machine SexTie & TeaseToysTravel Companion